Posts Tagged ‘tears’

It started a couple of weeks ago… I woke up distraught & in tears over a dream. It wasn’t the first vivid pregnancy dream I’ve had so far this pregnancy, but it WAS the first that was disturbing & angst-ridden.

Makings of Disturbing Dreams (more…)

For as long as I can remember, I’ve considered myself an “all or nothing” kind of person. I give things my all or I give nothing. I do something to the absolute best of my ability, or I don’t even attempt it. If I cannot do it right, why should I do it at all?

This way of thinking has been tremendously helpful on so many occasions. . . It helps me leave something alone so I can clear my mind to move on to the next. . . But, it also has me passing up good or fun opportunities out of fear that I won’t be good at them.

Wait. What? Fear? Out of FEAR? Surely not. It’s a matter of fact, not a matter of fear. Right?

Ugh. I don’t know any more.

The point is that, as a result of this way of thinking, when I finally get around to actually setting my mind to something, I am mostly successful & happy in regard to it. The flip side is that it takes me FOREVER to get around to actually making my mind up & taking action.

It's a sickening roller-coaster ride. . . (Image from

It’s a sickening roller-coaster ride. . . (Image from


So, today, I woke up, got dressed, & hit the grocery store.  Getting up & getting going, first thing, without trying to do something else or “ease my way into it” is kind of a big deal for me. When I try to “ease my way into it,” I wind up never quite getting going. The couch is my best friend. I kid you not.

So, I was patting myself on the back, walking around the grocery store, basket on one arm & my Starbucks grande, triple shot, three-pump hazelnut, two-pump mocha with soy & light whip in my other hand. I had already been through the produce section & was looking for some hot dogs in natural casing, when I heard my name from a few steps away. It was one of my friends that I haven’t seen in several weeks (months? I don’t know; I lose track).

We hugged & said our hellos. . . Then she asked the question that made me cry instantly. In public. Ugh. Embarrassing much?

Seriously?! (Image from

Seriously?! (Image from