Posts Tagged ‘depression’

It’s been a while… I feel like I never have time.. But, really, it is that I set my expectations for each post higher than it needs to be… I’ll be honest: I write with an audience in mind, sure… My audience is mostly friends & family who like to get updates, with some blogging friends I have made along the way… & there’s an intended audience of those random people out there who just happen to go through similar things as me, who I hope to give hope or insight or just let them know they’re not alone… But, in the end, I write for ME. I write because I feel better when I do… & because it is fun… & because I enjoy the connection & the release… It helps me calm the chaos of my mind. (Thankful #1)

So, with all of that said, I figured I’d sit & write whatever flows out of my head today… & why not make it part of two of my favorite blog hops: Ten Things of Thankful & Finish the Sentence Friday? 😉 I have much for which to be thankful, after all, & all of these things have a ripple effect, flowing into other parts of my life & affecting those I love.

I finished last semester of college with an okay GPA, but I failed one of my four classes. :/ That hit me pretty hard, considering the 4.0 overall GPA I had prior to that… BUT, I have come to terms with it… (Thankful #2) Frankly, I am still damn proud. I managed to pass three classes, maintain an overall honor student status, AND I had a beautiful baby girl during that semester! (Thankful #3) I’d say I am doing okay.

13718534_10153800957966194_5488825672648843702_n (more…)

Well, technically, I suppose that should read, “Dear Me,” but I have this overwhelming disconnect between who I am now (& who I have been in the past) & YOU — who I am going to be in just a few short months…

Dear You (more…)

“You’re not good enough & there’s something seriously wrong with you; no matter how hard you try, you’ll always fall short.”

“You’re too caught up in your own thoughts, too emotional, too intense, too numb, too calculated, too lethargic, too everything; you’re hard to love.”

Bitch (more…)

When I was 19-years-old, I was a hot mess… But I don’t know that I would change anything because it all turned out okay — for the most part…

Me at age 18 or 19

Me at age 18 or 19

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In many ways, this week has flown by. The boost in confidence that came my way towards the end of last week helped me throw some of my self-criticism aside enough to just be a little happier this week. (Thankful #1) This is not to say that The Bitch didn’t make an appearance — she did; she always does. . . BUT, it is to say that I was able to put her in the background instead of at the forefront, which is good. Hopefully, I can keep this up & it’ll be smooth sailing for a bit. . .

Smooth Sailing (more…)

I will be honest; I wasn’t going to write anything for Ten Things of Thankful. Again. Ugh. BUT, then I remembered that this week marks the 100th week! So, I should probably pull my crap together to be a part of it, eh? 😉

I am grateful Ten Things of Thankful exists. (Thankful #1) I might not participate as often as I would like or as often as I really should, but it is a nudge in the right direction when my thoughts get too gloomy. Heck! Even when I don’t participate, knowing it is out there has me thinking about what I would write if I wasn’t so caught up in my own thoughts to the point where I can’t untangle the mess enough to create a post. The reminder to be thankful sometimes is enough.

Rainbow in Clouds (more…)

It is no wonder that my weight has BALLOONED in the past couple of years. Yes, yes. . . I quit smoking & got married within a couple of months — & people say each of those on their own have a tendency to contribute to the addition of some of the poundage. . .BUT, even though I’ve, arguably, cut down quite a bit on the drinking, I’ve started baking & cooking A LOT more & I appreciate food more now.

Ballooned (more…)