I Cry A Lot (TToT #10)

Posted: November 21, 2014 in Self Realization
Tags: , , , , , , ,

I cry a lot. Like, I mean, A LOT.

I cry anytime my emotions get overwhelming, it seems — which, like I said, is a lot.

I suppose I should learn (somehow) to look at it as a good thing since it obviously isn’t going to change any time soon. . .

It IS quite frustrating, though. . . On so many levels. . .

So many tears. . . (Image from morgeFile.com)

So many tears. . . (Image from morgeFile.com)

I cry because I am lonely.

I cry because I miss my sons.

I cry because I miss my best friends. My family. My home state.

I cry because I miss my mother — who has been dead for nearly 16 years.

I cry because I miss my husband, even though we live under the same roof.

I cry because I feel inadequate.

I cry because I loathe housework, yet I allowed myself to become a housewife.

I cry because I have no control over my body in trying to have a child with my husband.

I cry because I’ve had braces for nearly a-year-and-a-half & I have nothing to show for it yet.

I cry because I have an eye that needs at least one drop every day — & might need it for the rest of my life if I don’t go blind in it first.

I cry because I quit smoking, but also started eating more & moving less, thus, I live in the largest version of my body it has ever been.

But, I suppose, I also cry because I am happy. (Thankful #1)

I cry because I love it when my son calls me unexpectedly. (Thankful #2)

I cry because I got to see my best friend again, unexpectedly, so reason says it’ll happen again soon. (Thankful #3)

I cry because I know I am lucky to have so many people to care about that seem to also care about me. (Thankful #4)

I cry because my husband says & does just the right things at just the right moment, more often than not. (Thankful #5)

I cry because my son will be here in just a few nights to spend a week-and-a-half with us over Thanksgiving. (Thankful #6)

I cry because I am alive. (Thankful #7)

I cry because I am a hormonal, emotional female. . . & I suppose it’s better than not feeling anything at all. (Thankful #8)

Then, I cry because I actually feel the need to share the fact that I cry a lot — even if I am glad to have the outlet! (Thankful #9)

I cry for all of these reasons & plenty more. . .

I even cry when I don’t even have a reason, it seems. . .

I’m learning to embrace this part of me. . . (Thankful #10) It is obviously not going to change, so it seems prudent to at least try to accept it, eh?

 

 

 

Advertisements
Comments
  1. For every ugly cry there are at least ten beautiful ones caused by wonderful circumstances. We ALWAYS have to remember that in the face of darkness and I’m glad that you do and did.
    Cry if you need to love. Let the ugly out and the beauty in (but you can show the world how awesome life truly can be through snot…yes…snot) xo

    Like

  2. Kristi says:

    I’ve never liked to cry, but you list some positive thankfuls.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. (as the the sole co-host from Y Chromia), I would like to say, …. good Post! keep up the good work!
    lol… volumes of Posts to be written about crying and the differences between the genders….fortunately (for me), I have the Wakefield Doctrine and fortunately (for us) when it comes to understanding how the different personality types do things, we have the ‘everything Rule’ (which states: everyone does everything, at one time or another). This means, when considering crying, it comes down to: what is is to me, in my worldview.

    very difficult and, fortunately rare occurrence. But one of the things I enjoy the most about this here bloghop here, is being invited to share a part of other people’s lives in these Posts.
    In that, I will say, thank you for joining us at the TToT

    Liked by 1 person

  4. froginparis says:

    I went through a season like that. Then I stumbles across a verse that says-basically-God collects all my tears in a bottle. Not one is wasted. It helped with the feeling of yuck about crying.

    AND good tears don’t happen often enough. I love your list. wipes tear

    Liked by 1 person

    • Reta Jayne says:

      Thank you so much for this!! As silly as it might sound, I just (literally JUST) got done watching “Heaven is For Real.” It is solidifying my newfound belief that maybe my tears aren’t so horrible after all. . . I need to look up this verse you are referring to; I could use that right about now. THANK YOU, again! ❤

      Like

  5. christine says:

    I cry when I get really mad. It drives me bonkers.
    I don’t have really big cries very often, but I tear up all the time. During the singing of the national anthem. During the 8th grade vs. teachers volleyball game. During movies. My kids are constantly asking, “Are you crying?” It is not crying. I’m just getting a little teary.

    Glad you have so many reasons to cry happy tears. Those are the best.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Reta Jayne says:

      The happy tears ARE the best! I get angry about some of the other tears too, though. .. Maybe “angry” isn’t quite the right word, for me, though. . .Frustrated, perhaps? Ashamed or embarrassed sometimes. . . But, I am starting to look at it in a new light. . . Maybe it’s not such a bad thing, afterall. . .

      Like

  6. Sandy Ramsey says:

    Sometimes I wish I cried more. I hate to cry and I fight it. When it finally does come, when I can’t hold it in any longer, it exhausts me but it feels so cleansing. I’m sorry for all the sad moments that make you cry but having happy things to cry over and realizing that is so is quite a blessing.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Reta Jayne says:

      I do the same thing from time to time, Sandy. . . Exhausting, but cleansing. That is completely truthful! You’re absolutely right. . . I am glad I posted this — I was slightly embarrassed to do so. . . But, I am starting to think it may be a blessing in disguise. . . That’s okay. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  7. fangboner1 says:

    I used to be the same way. I would cry over everything and anything. Not sure what happened. I still cry over stupid stuff but not as often.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. zoebyrd says:

    I cry more than I used to. But usually in very guarded situations. I suppose not holding back all that crap is a good thing and crying for happy is just a lovely little charming thing…. SO EMBRACE IT!!!! Way to cry! Have a great holiday with the kiddo home!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Reta Jayne says:

      The more I think about it, the more I think that maybe it IS a good thing. . . I over-analyze & dwell on things SO MUCH as it is. . . I can only imagine how much worse that tendency would be if I didn’t let out my emotions in the form of tears as necessary. . . God made me like this for a reason, I suppose. 😉 Thank you for that!

      Like

  9. valj2750 says:

    I miss my mother everyday – she’s been gone 61/2 years. She was a crier – all the time, any emotion came rolling down her cheeks. She had several pair of sunglasses she wore now and again to diffuse the waterworks. I think it is beautiful that you can be filled with emotion and let the tears of joy, or tears of sadness, or tears of love fall. Happy Thanksgiving.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Reta Jayne says:

      I am starting to forget pieces of my mother, I am sad to say. . . I do remember her with tears in her eyes an awful lot, though. . . &, I guess it wasn’t all sad. . . Something to ask my family about, I think. Happy Thanksgiving to you too!

      Like

  10. Khai says:

    I have been bawling like a baby for the last year or so and before then had never cried.

    Since the last year has been one of the most stable of my life, I couldn’t understand why I was suddenly this soggy mess, until someone finally clued me in that it was because I was finally safe enough to process ALL THE EMOTIONS. I would bet some of that is true for you as well.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. lrconsiderer says:

    Ohhh bless your boots!

    I rarely, rarely cry. When I do, unless I’m having a hysterical angry moment, then it matters DEEP. Most of the time I just cry on the inside and my heartstrings get all tight and my soul aches.

    Liked by 1 person

What's on your mind? Don't be shy. Spill it.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s