My vision blurs with tears, my heart feels it’ll burst out of my chest, & my head spins just enough to remind me how alive I am…

Blessed Read the rest of this entry »

Well, technically, I suppose that should read, “Dear Me,” but I have this overwhelming disconnect between who I am now (& who I have been in the past) & YOU — who I am going to be in just a few short months…

Dear You Read the rest of this entry »

“You’re not good enough & there’s something seriously wrong with you; no matter how hard you try, you’ll always fall short.”

“You’re too caught up in your own thoughts, too emotional, too intense, too numb, too calculated, too lethargic, too everything; you’re hard to love.”

Bitch Read the rest of this entry »

She used to be a confidant, a drinking partner, a shoulder to cry on — one of my best friends.

Now, I look at her & roll my eyes because all I can see is her selfishness, evident in the way she blatantly bulldozed through boundaries I had clearly set, (& by the carefully constructed social media updates, designed to evoke sympathy or envy or understanding, despite being only a small fraction of the actual truth).

Walked All Over Read the rest of this entry »

When I was 19-years-old, I was a hot mess… But I don’t know that I would change anything because it all turned out okay — for the most part…

Me at age 18 or 19

Me at age 18 or 19

Read the rest of this entry »

I feel like a horrible, worthless person.

Maybe that’s a slight exaggeration… (But only slight.)

Even after our miscarriage last year, I, somehow, cannot just enjoy this pregnancy.

I am MISERABLE! Seriously.

Baby Girl or Alien Parasite Read the rest of this entry »

It’s been way too long… As a result, I have all kinds of nonsense built up in my brain. You’d think I would practice what I preach & write more often to prevent this from happening, but it is just not that simple, it seems. There are numerous insecurities that come into play… & a struggle to prioritize… &, well, just plain ol’ not feeling like it… But, then again, I don’t feel like doing much on a lot of days, so, yeah…

Anyway, because it has been so long, there’s a lot I want to get out. I won’t promise any kind of cohesiveness today. All I will promise is sincerity & good ol’ brain dump. Maybe I will even get to tie my thoughts into a Ten Things of Thankful post by the time I’m done. We shall see… (I did it! Thankful #1)

Where to begin?

Brain Dump Read the rest of this entry »